Happy Birthday to Youuuu

2015/05/28

It’s one of my roommate’s birthday. She knows who she is.  It’s time to celebrate that 2-1.  Stay safe and take care of yourself always. Although you think you’re all that you got, I got your back.  I’m praying for your safety and many more years to come.  You’re such a bright star in my eyes. You are one true seastar to me.

Happy Happy 21st Birthday! You’re legal in all terms now.

Advertisements

I have a mental illness

2015/05/13

I have yet to desire to define which mental illness I have.  There is stigma regardless of the statement, therefore by not mentioning it, I hope to help all others who have different illnesses be they mental or physical.

I was recently hospitalized.  I met some wonderful high-functioning individuals.  I recall writing prose to response of one of the other client’s work of art.  I will share it with you now:

response in COLORBLIND

“We’re aiming for higher. Waiting for everything to continue moving as we stay and hurry up to wait.  There is no conclusion because all the reparations and exclusions.  There is no more glass ceiling.  I am beyond limitation.  Personal insight, is a struggle.  I continue to fight the me no one accepts in the world outside this prison of function.  Expelled by medication my retribution is the distribution of anonymity.  I have become zombie to survive your definitions.  First comes the struggle to fight the temptation of ecstasy and zen attained by my knowledges of something more righteous.  Out this box I reach beyond.  Truth is my drug.  I seek more answers.  What makes me so righteous? When was God and is God over in a view of my new pic?”

Reintegrated/Regenerated: Happy Mother’s Day

2015/05/11

Life has taken me on a new cycle.
Instead of the hamster grind on the Streets of BMore, I’ve traveled far.
I’ve been regenerating and concentrating on me and a better portrayal of my insides for the outside.
I’ve explored people, places and things because of this move.
Once upon a time, I moved at the pace of an iceberg, ever cautious of the ripple effect.
Now I’m going on, doing me.
Making MOVES.
My motivation has changed.
God’s Light is ever so stronger.
This is to all the Mothers’ Day celebrants.
This is for YOU Moms.
I miss you.
Wish I could be in the motherland with you celebrating your day.
HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY.

Thank You

2009/12/15

I always use manners.

Thank You.

I also Love that I grew up watching my Local Idea Station, PBS 😀

To My Previous Capacity

2009/12/15

To Those Who Know and Those Who Do Not.

I Resign. You will not see me Today or Tomorrow.

To Those Who Care and Those Who Do Not.

You Do Have an address where my Paperwork can be sent.

It is the Law.

Dear Aunt Flo

2009/12/12

Dear Aunt Flo,

I don’t know if I hate You, because that word is too strong and negative, you are my Aunt, and I still consider you Dear.

I don’t know if it is the fact that You make me have inappropriate breakdowns and/or fluctuations of emotions that I may think I feel that way. Or this way. Or another way. Or I cannot decide. Or…maybe you should just tell me.

I don’t know if it is the fact that You are Natural and We all have to wait for You and that We all get scared when We don’t see You.

I don’t know why I looked at this today: http://adiamondisforever.com/ and stared at it forever.  Not because it was shiny or because I thought it was romantic.  Because I was at work, and I was trying to figure out if when I do get married in the far away future, I may, or may not expect one similar because maybe the concept is ideal.  Or maybe I like it a lot because everyone else gets expensive things from potential suitors in hopes that things will happen.  Or maybe I was staring at it, debating and justifying the negativity that surround the process in which it was made.  Or maybe I was trying to justify my materialism.  Or maybe it was just so shiny and I could not look away.

I don’t know why I thought and remembered that Al Gore invented the internet.  And then thought about all the things that surround just that idea.  And remembered the movie The Matrix and it’s relativity to what is going on now.  And remembered that IEP web addresses are traced on your computer.  And then remembered how much I love technology because of it’s untapped possibilities.  And then remembered that it is tapped into. And then remembered that this new from of technology and communication like all communication is governmentally owned and documented and controlled and monitored.  And then I remembered the movie The Enemy of the State and how it was remade when I remembered the movie Eagle Eye.  And then I remembered the parallels in all the media that always happen just like Living Single and Friends.  And than I remembered In Living Color.  And then I remembered Saturday Night Live.

And then I remembered why I write this blog thing.  And then I remembered what invasion of privacy means.

And then I remembered People will always be misunderstood if People don’t care enough or try hard enough to understand them.  And then I remembered that some of the People today at that meeting thing I went to understood Me.  And then I remembered that some People talk in code.  And then I remembered Chismis is the Pilipino Grapevine of an undocumented, altered form of history.  And then I remembered how much I missed my Aunties.  And then I remembered how much I really did want to go with Dhanz. And then I remembered Obama’s story when he returned to his Father’s Own Land.  And then I remembered that is what is probably what was needed.  And then I remembered Sarah Palin’s new book.  And then I remembered how I keep on forgetting to buy it and read it.

And then I remembered I need to stop writing because I have Christmas Cards to send out.

XO,

iamyellowiambrowniamwoman

Why I Really Quit My Old Job and Only the Government Knows

2009/12/12

No one would help me figure what was really going on.

In 2007, Major Universities received funds upon the passage of the College Cost Reduction and Access Act HR 2669, and the earmark bill Part J–Strengthening Historically Black College and Universities and Other Minority-Serving Institutions.

And now they are trying to trap all the Cool Kids to go There with their awesome marketing that psychologically misleads others.

Well it was an accumulation of things.

But really, no one really helped me try to figure this out.  I asked old SGA Appropriations Board Members.  And countless administrators that I thought would actually assist me or point me in the right direction to even begin my sleuthing.

Actually the accumulation of my personal life and this document led me to Civally Disobey that crap.  Because it is and was and forever shall be. Crap.

And I was supposed to be the spokesperson and condone this act.

Crap.

And only the Good People at the Old Job knew.

But now You do too!

And all the Real Cool Kids that know how to decipher real codes!

You, YOUth are the Best!

I <3 Men

2009/12/11

Once upon a time ago, I could easily express that I Love Men vocally, verbally, proverbially

but Now I am somewhat scared.

Once upon a time ago, I did not mind having open relationships.  Until I got my heart broken. And the next time I saw Him was when I was a server.  He was with his new extended family.  And all He could do was hide from me.  But I saw Him in plain sight from my assigned table.  And still I kept my composure, schmoozed, and was then compensated for my ability to overact.  The hardest part was that He was there.  It was the Holiday season…actually the same time in My Life here in the Present…but just a Year ago.  The hardest part was that He was there….and did not acknowledge Me.  But the best part was when I called Him a Year before this incident and cursed him out. On. New. Year’s. Eve.

Happy New Year!  I’m Better WithOUT YOU!

Once upon a time ago, I waited.  I’m tired of waiting.  Why can’t Men be more Aggressive? With Love, Life, Direction. Maybe a couple of sentences ago…the generalized word Men was an overstatement.  But a lot of very Strong, Smart, Beautiful Men are just making me….wait.  Aggressiveness is a sign of healthy competition in your attempt to ensure Survival of the Fit.

So be Fit, Stay Fit, Let’s get Fit Together.  Be Aggressive in a Better Way…a Healthier Way.  Be Direct with Your Feelings. State your Intentions and Don’t Assume.  Communicate because I am here to Listen…You know, in person where real Life takes place and in fact does become Personal.  Because I want to form an Interpersonal Relationship with You.  And not with You and Your Poems.  Not You and Your Songs.  Not You and Your FaceBook Status.  Not You and Your Text Messages.  Not You and Your 2-minute Phone Conversations. Not You and Your Subtle Hints/Passive Aggressiveness.

I Lied.  I. Am. STILL. Waiting.

Because until A Man knows this Truth and acts upon it, I will Wait.

Italy

2009/12/11

To tell you the Truth.  I Love Italian Culture.  Well I Love European Culture altogether.  But I am not sure of this trailer and also not sure of what to think of it:

http://www.apple.com/trailers/weinstein/nine/medium.html

To tell you the Truth.  Upon further review, The Film is something I will watch.  And then judge to my own personal standards.  I base those new formed opinions after viewing the website:

http://www.nine-movie.com/#/about-the-film

To tell you the Truth.  The website is Genius.  Just the Glitz and Glam and Order and Listing and Photography and Placement and Juxtaposition and Film Biographies…and lack of certain Film Biographies…is Genius.

The Women are shining in the forefront while the Focus is on the Male Lead.  The abandon of the Filmmakers to put their Own Biographies is key to the Movie’s Marketing.

The Women are depicted around the Male Lead.  Each with their Own Individual

Character, Idiosyncrasy, Talent, Voice and Philanthropy.

To tell you the Truth. I cannot wait to watch this on Christmas Day with my Female Family Members.

And I cannot wait to talk about how this Truly depicts Life.

And I cannot wait to discuss how We do in Fact secretly rule the World

in All of Our Beautifully Unique Ways.

Weekends

2009/12/10

It is hard working Weekends, because You are by Yourself and No One believes your documentation. I know how many hours I work and I know how long it takes me to eat. And I know how long it takes me to eat with Family that is visiting.

It is hard working Weekends, because I would much rather have my Teammates there. Well, just Those that know how a Team functions–Those that know that where one falls short, the other should pick up. Those that know mind games are just games and our work should be shared and carried evenly.

It is hard working Weekends, because Weekends used to be when I would spend time for Me.

It is hard working Weekends, because I have to work an 11 day-work week to surround that Weekend.

It is hard working Weekends, because I used to Love the word Weekend.

But now….

I. Am. Indifferent.